Until recently, I was a work-at-home-mom (WAHM). I had a full-time job for a company based far away from my domicile, and I was tasked with impossible goals for succeeding both professionally and domestically. I was my worst enemy by burdening myself with impossible amounts of guilt over what I ‘should’ be doing, and how I felt I was to progress.
Since joining the company over two years prior, I was plagued with a sense of self-doubt and instability. I was never sure how my next phone call with my supervisor would go, or what my next role change would entail.
In short, I worked for an organization that was headed by an erratic and unreasonable owner who changed the course of the organization on a minute-by-minute basis. Being a remote employee who was far removed from the chambers of office politics, and who was more interested in parenting my two children, I was put at a major disadvantage.
When I first found out that I was being laid-off, my heart sank. I was scared of the unknown, and most importantly I was terrified about finding a new venture and a new employment opportunity. I was fortunate that I was given months of warning, but then again, I was unfortunate that I was given months of warning.
Chronic stress, sleepless nights, and fits of tears consumed my day to day life. I felt my colleagues distancing themselves from me further and further each day, and I was consumed with feelings of disappointment, self-doubt, and stress.
Finally, my final day approached and I was indifferent. In fact, I was excited – I was able to dump a huge rock off of my shoulders, and I was free to enjoy my children for the summertime.
Fast forward to today, a month later. I am happy – in fact, I am happier than I have been in years. While I do not know what the future holds for me, I am relieved that I was able to dump something toxic out of my life, that I get to enjoy every second of my two kid’s lives, and that The Universe has opened a new door for me.
While change is scary and it is easy to become consumed with a ‘doom and gloom’ outlook, it is imperative to keep both your eyes – and your heart – open to change in your life.